Category Archives: Gin

Best short gin jokes, puns and quotes – let the fun be-gin

Too much gin can make you tearful – so here’s an antidote. Some lovely gin jokes and one-liners to read and share while you’re enjoying an ice cold G&T.

Brought to you by a lovely new smooth dry gin from the ancient walled city, York Gin

– “I exercise strong self control. I never drink anything stronger than gin before breakfast.” -WC Fields

– Don’t cry over spilt milk: it could have been gin.

– I drank so much last night, I woke up with a London Dry accent.

– I tried to say no to gin, but it’s 42.5% stronger than me.

– “I don’t know what reception I’m at but, for God’s sake, give me a gin and tonic.” – Denis Thatcher

– If at first you don’t succeed, try, try a gin.

– What do you call someone who’s never had a G&T? A virgin.

– What’s the sophisticated drinker’s favourite Xmas carol? Gin-gle bells, gin-gle bells ….

– “Trust me you can dance.” ⁃ Gin

– When life gives you lemons (or limes) make a gin and tonic.

– Save water: drink gin.

– PLEASE DRINK GIN RESPONSIBLY. Don’t spill it.

– “The only time I ever enjoyed ironing was the day I accidentally got gin in the steam iron.” – Phyllis Diller

– A gin and tonic has 91 calories. A banana has 115 calories. My doctor told me to make the healthy choice. I love my doctor.

– A yawn is a silent scream for gin.

– I want someone to look at me the same way I look at gin.

– Gin and bear it.

– Good friends offer advice. Real friends offer gin.

– Exercise. Walking round the house looking for my glass of gin.

– I didn’t text you. Gin did.

– Sometimes I have a bath because it’s difficult to drink gin in the shower.

– If you can’t remember my name just say ‘Gin’ and I’ll turn around.

– I love you slightly less than gin.

– Gin lovers are better lovers.

– I make gin disappear. What’s your superpower?

– Education is important. But gin is importanter.

– Gin and tonic is the answer … What was the question?

– Gin: because everyone needs a hobby.

– My resting face is also my thinking about gin face.

– Size does matter. No-one wants a small gin and tonic.

– A day without gin is like … I have no idea.

– A woman goes into a bar with a roll of tarmac in her bag. She says: “A large gin and tonic please. And one for the road.”

– You should have a warm heart and a cold gin and tonic.

Brought to you by York Gin – check out their website. They have a great story to tell and you can buy their gorgeous gin on there too! You can also buy it in and around York plus a growing number of bars outside the city including the famous London Gin Club.

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