At the start of the year, I decided I should make a new year’s resolution.
I’d already stopped drinking lager in vast quantities and smoking my beloved Marlboro reds years before – and I was getting twitchy.
I like giving things up, you see. Especially ones that kill you.
Having said that, there’s no way I’m ever giving up Tramadol, fizzy Ribena or Crunchy Nut Cornflakes.
So it seemed obvious to go cold turkey on some other serious addictions – social media and reading the news.
I’ve been obsessed with the news for over 30 years – ever since the nightly reports on the BBC from the Arbitration and Conciliation Service, ACAS. I was even a journalist for a while.
And I’m a nosy swine who likes reading about other people’s misery. And I’m a sucker for a glib, shallow inspirational quote.
Three months without my regular digital updates, am I really still alive and compos mentis (Latin for sane)?
Well yes – and no. But that’s a different blog.
So what happened?
On the positive side:
I feel less twitchy about the imminent threat of being shot dead or blown up by ISIS, or whatever the media calls them now.
I feel less angry that we have a government full of the highest class of twat imaginable.
I haven’t missed the inspirational quotes at all. Strange, that.
On the negative side:
I don’t know what several acquaintances have been eating at each meal – and in between each meal.
I’ve started obsessively looking at my bank balance, the weather forecast for 20+ locations and I’m addicted to Wikipedia’s random page generator.
I haven’t seen Donald Trump’s picture all year.
As is usual with experiments of this kind, then, a mixed bag of results. I may return to my former addictions – or I may not.
But one thing is certain: the phrase ‘digital detox’ is really annoying.