As well as sunstroke, sunburn, food poisoning and alcohol poisoning, the beach holiday holds hidden dangers.
Here are our top slight injuries from a week in Crete.
Keep it handy for next summer – and add your own. Remember – sharing your pain reduces it.
Thank goodness we’re off back to work and school – where health and safety are taken more seriously.
Hit knee on bath faucet while stomping on clothes.
Hit head on beach umbrella (x7 per day).
Hit head on beach lounger.
Trapped fingers in beach lounger.
Stubbed toe on slightly raised marble floor in hotel.
Slipped and fell on hotel room’s just-washed marble floor.
Scraped nipple on side of pedallo when clambering back in. (Worst due to actual bleeding.)
Bit tongue when sneezed.
Slightly burnt elbow when arm slipped across an occasional table and touched tea cup.
Slightly tripped over a pavement in the nearest fishing port town.
Hit in the eye by the zip of a renegade cardigan.
Hit in face by corner of a lilo in wavy sea.
Slight headbutt resulting from having two people on a lilo in wavy sea.
Scuffed toe on wooden slatted path leading from hotel to the sea across very hot sand.
Scratched leg and wrist applying sun lotion
Injudiciously applied sun cream into a rash on back of knee.
Sand in eyes.
Slight tooth damage from biting into sand sandwich.
Swimming costume wedgie.
Getting sun cream in eyes and mouth.
Nail ripped putting trainers on.
Roll on September.
Thank you to the following victims for sharing their heart- rending experiences:
Briony, Guy and Emma.
Our thoughts are always with you.
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