We all know breakfast is the most important meal of the day.
And we all know the best breakfast is pancakes.
Logically, therefore, ‘Shrove Tuesday’ or ‘Pancake Day’ is the most important day of the year if you eat, like most of us do.
Question: Why do most of us not bother eating breakfast?
Answer: The extra 15 minutes in bed is worth the long-term damage to our health.
That’s not the end of the blog. I usually do 300 to 400 words.
So here’s a list of breakfasts that can improve your performance at work. An investment in calories could give you a healthy return in your pay packet!
I’m told they’re made out of the same stuff as Yorkshire Puddings, but that seems a little far-fetched. Luckily you don’t have to worry about what’s in them – M&S make the mixture for you.
Fact: with a syrup, sugar or Nutella topping, pancakes give you exactly the right amount of fat and sugar to make you happy. Colleagues and bosses will notice your more positive, can-do attitude immediately. Go for it and get that promotion.
This has become more popular since Ready Brek adverts started to disappear from public consciousness. Just to reiterate, porridge is not radioactive. It’s actually quite good for you. But it’s only edible if you add syrup or sugar in vast
quantities into it. Scottish people apparently put salt in it. This is the strongest
independence argument I’ve yet heard.
The 5:2 starvation diet apparently makes you alert and better able to concentrate. This sounds like nonsense. I can’t concentrate on anything when my stomach is growling like a heterosexual pitbull having a rectal examination at the vet’s.
8 cups of black coffee and 10 Benson & Hedges. This certainly keeps the weight down. Have you seen those poor little lads? They make rakes look slightly podgy. I asked a nutritionist to give a professional opinion but she was too busy lighting up to answer.
Of course you’re supposed to eat it, of course it’s really good for you and helps you poo easier and makes your skin glow and makes you feel really good about yourself and the world. But who can face kiwi fruit, satsumas or apples at 7am? Or 7pm for that matter?
Sugar Puffs and other cereals.
Really tasty but make you start acting like you’re five years old. This isn’t a problem if you work in marketing, PR or advertising.
Bacon, eggs, sausages, beans, shrooms (I can’t be the only person to abbreviate the popular edible fungus in this way), beans, black pudding, fried bread, bread and butter, cup of tea. This is not recommended as it tends to cause heart attacks, strokes and sleepiness. This final side-effect can adversely affect your career.
The above with disgusting substance called white pudding. Those readers with a strong constitution can Google it.
And finally, remember the old Shrove Tuesday adage:
“Stuff loads of pancakes down your gob today for tomorrow is Ash Wednesday – and ash tastes horrible compared to pancakes.”
If you enjoyed this, you may enjoy my post about why Failure is often better than success. Or just have a browse around – there should be something that makes you a bit happier.
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Copyright Simon Henry @simlington 2014